Pet Peeves

Top 10 Grammatical Pet Peeves (in no particular order):

1. Expresso

Now, for you non-coffee drinkers out there (so basically everyone reading this except maybe Mom), this is actually spelled espresso. Notice that there is no “x” in this word. If anyone asks me for an “expresso truffle” at work again, I think I might kill them. If any of you EVER say expresso around me, you won’t live long. You’ve been warned.

2. Adverb problems (no ly)

This is a favorite of Andrea’s. “He doesn’t take me serious.” Hello! There is an ly on the end of that! “He doesn’t take me seriously.” Please add the ly on the word seriously! Serious.

3. Snuck-vs-Sneaked, the perpetual war

Now, when you search for “snuck” on www.dictionary.reference.com, you get, “verb, sneaked or snuck.” However, either dictionary.com is wrong or snuck is a newly added word to the English vocabulary. It has always been sneaked, but snuck has been used so many times, no one even notices anymore. Sneaked sounds wrong now! Snuck is a misspelled word in Microsoft Word as well. Either way, I don’t like it so it shouldn’t exist. So there.

4. Anyways
This is one that I fell prey to for years. Tom pointed this out to me - “anyways” is not actually a word. The correct word is “anyway.” No “s” on that word. This is something that everyone does, but they’re wrong. And I’m right. Boo yah!

5. Boo yah!
I hate it when people say boo yah.

6. Chat Jargon (especially smileys)
This I can thank Betsy for. As I was chatting with her last night, she threw a smiley my way, thinking it would be cute, or perhaps funny, or maybe just entertaining somehow. What is actually was, was what made me cry myself to sleep, particularly when she added a “ttyl” at the end of the conversation. I hate you so much, Betsy, I hate you so much.

7. Sherbet
Notice that there is one “r” in this word. Good, now pronounce it like there’s one “r” in this word.

8. Whole ‘nother
This one really shouldn’t be here because I use it all the time. Actually, never mind, it should be, because I get mad every time I say it. And I say it a lot. Where did this come from? Whole another isn’t even right, let alone making it a contraction. But what else communicates the same thing? Whole other has a completely different meaning. Help me with this one, what can I say to replace it from my vocabulary?

9. Change Slang
Fitty cent. Why, why, why? Why would you ever say fitty cent? Where did this ridiculous slang come from and why has it been allowed to continue to exist? Why hasn’t the government done something about this? I think this will be one of the major issues in the next presidential election.

10. Good-vs-well
Ok, ok, ok. I know I do this one all the time. So it really shouldn’t be on this list on my personal pet peeves, especially cause I don’t get mad when I say it. However, in my defense, I only use it in one situation. When I am asked, “How are you doing,” I often say, “I’m good.” Now, I’ve never told anyone this, but I don’t mean, “I am doing well.” What I’m saying is, “Damn, I’m good!” I’m just making sure everyone knows how awesome I am every time they ask. You know how it is – Oh Lord it’s hard to be humble when you’re perfect in every way.